Lessons on the loss of a father

1 Kings 2:1-4

Comment or Commend the life of the deceased

Comfort the family and friends

Charge or Counsel all of us present


David’s life is one of contrasts. His life is marked by great successes and tragic failures. When people think of David, they usually remember one of two events. People will either remember David and Goliath, or David and Bathsheba.

Notice that in these two vignettes, David succeeded on the battlefield, and failed on the home front.

There are many other instances like these in David’s life. Times when he stood tall in the eyes of his men and his enemies, but fell so far short when it came to his family. How many of us men fall into that same category? Still, there is one outstanding fact in David’s life that makes him a blessing.

Through it all, success and failure alike, David had a personal relationship with Almighty God, Acts 13:22.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.

Everything has a season. We see the same things in the lives we live right now.

We enter a new season of life when we

  • Get a new job

  • Get married

  • Have kids

  • Kids become teens

  • Kids leave home

  • We move

  • We retire

Different life events lead to Different seasons in our life. Some of you here today may be entering a new season of life as a natural occurrence. Whether you have just become parents or gotten married or changed jobs. Others of you may be recognizing that you need to make some changes in life and thus enter a new season of life. I am speaking to men, who like me, sometimes succeed and sometimes fail.

David recognizes that there is the potential of a GAP

  1. Gap of Presence

  2. Gap of Participation

  3. Gap of Personality i.e. Passivity

Every man needs a SPIRITUAL FATHER

  1. Ongoing relationship

  2. Teach by example

  3. Discipline


A Changing Of The Guard - (Ill. Death is certain - None of us are immortal, Heb. 9:27.)

A Charge To The Next Generation -

A Challenge To Be What You Are -

  1. To provide for your family - 1 Tim. 5:8

  2. To nurture your family - Eph. 6:4

  3. To take the leadership role in your household - 1 Tim. 3:4, (Ill. Men will give account!) Not a tyrant, but a loving leader! Lead them to church! Lead them to Jesus! Show them what a godly walk is all about. They need to see it and they need to see it in you!

  4. To take the leadership in our churches

  5. To take the leadership in our community

  6. To love your family - Eph. 5:25

  7. To be a godly example – Be a man! This implies living a Christ-centered, disciplined life! (Are you the kind of adult you would want your children to grow up and be like?)

  8. What legacy are you leaving behind?


A Committed Life – We need men of God who are living a surrendered, dedicated, wholly sold out life. Is this the man your children see? We need men who are men of: Prayer, The Book, Dedication, Character, Integrity, Conviction, Principle, Purpose, Men of God! (Ill. Matt. 5:16) (Ill. Caleb and Joshua, Num. 13-14; Josh. 14:8, 9, 14)

A Completed Life - Our children need to see first hand, that a personal relationship with Jesus makes a difference. That there is value in following Jesus! This requires honesty and dedication! This is a call to integrity! Let’s strive to be the same men at home, at play, at work that we are at church. (The truth is, Jesus makes a difference, or He is simply not present - 2 Cor. 5:17!)


There were some things that David wanted to leave behind for his son.

A Monument - Evidence that his life had not been in vain! Godly children are monuments to godly parents! (What kind of children am I leaving to this world?) God help us to build monuments to the saving grace of God in our children so that the next generation may come to know our God!

A Ministry - David knew that if Solomon wholly followed the Lord, his ministry would continue after he was long gone. Our children’s lives will continue to be evidence of our ministry in this world long after we are gone. The question is, what kind of legacy are you going to leave behind?

Who wants to raise a drunk? A harlot? A drug addict? A rebel? An abuser? A hypocrite?) No one! We want our children to turn out right. Therefore, let’s give them every opportunity to turn out right. Why? Often what they become is what they see in us.

There are exceptions! There are times when you do the best you can by your children. You pray for them, take them to church, raise them in the fear and admonition of the Lord, and they still rebel and run to the world. Don’t beat yourself up over their choices! Continue to live for God, pray for their salvation and trust God to save them in His time!)

A Mark - Most men’s accomplishments are forgotten at their graveside. This sermon will probably not be remembered tomorrow by most of those here today. In truth, most of us will never leave a permanent mark on this world. But, by leaving behind children of integrity, conviction and character, we will leave a mark on this world that neither the grave, time nor any other force will ever be able to erase! We will mark our world by the legacy we leave in our children!


When Great Men Die

  1. Martin Luther King died and he left behind – I have a dream

  2. Malcolm X died and left behind whatever means necessary

  3. Booker T Washington died and left behind Tuskegee Institute

  4. George Washington Carver died and left behind

  5. WEB Dubois died and left behind the Souls of Black Folk

  6. Every one of the great men in the Bible died

  7. Jesus Christ died

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